What were your parents like?

How were you raised? What did you like about what your parents did and what things do you want to do differently with your own children? What type of parenting did your children's other parent experience?

It's unlikely that both of you experienced similar childhoods. That means that unconsciously you will each be parenting from a different background. If you both remember loving how your parents treated you, you will have an easier time parenting because you can simply repeat what you learned from your parents.

However, if you are like many, there are things you absolutely want to do differently with your own children. For example, I knew I didn't want to spank my kids even though I was spanked. We also knew we didn't want to put extreme academic pressure on our children like my husband had experienced.

Changing your parenting to be different than the way you were raised takes work. One wonderful way to explore other ideas for parenting is through taking a parenting class or reading and discussing parenting books together.

My husband and I took parenting classes and read books. It was the best investment we've ever made!