Nick Ortner, founder of the Tapping Solution, walks her through the experience using tapping to release the strong emotion that she still has around that event.
Friday, February 28, 2014
When Parent's Words Seriously Hurt Children
When you say something negative to your children, it may end up haunting them for the rest of their lives. In this video, Bobbie talks about the pain she experiences as an adult as a result of hearing her dad tell her "I wish you were never born" when she was 5-years-old.
Nick Ortner, founder of the Tapping Solution, walks her through the experience using tapping to release the strong emotion that she still has around that event.
Nick Ortner, founder of the Tapping Solution, walks her through the experience using tapping to release the strong emotion that she still has around that event.
Monday, February 17, 2014
Discipline Without Screaming and Threatening
A mom wrote that her biggest parenting challenge is to discipline without screaming and threatening. This is a common parenting struggle as it’s a very natural reaction to increase your volume when your kids don’t obey the first time. Before you know it, you’ve added threats to try to force them to behave.
When you start yelling and threatening, you really let your kids off the hook for their poor behavior. Now they can focus on your out-of-control behavior instead of their own misbehavior.
If you can remain calm and actually lower your voice, you will be in a more powerful position. By remaining composed, you can hold your kids accountable for their behavior without escalating the situation.
Is it easy? No! But I learned to change my screaming into calm, confident parenting and you can too! Discover the effective parenting ideas in Priceless Parenting’s online parenting classes.
When you start yelling and threatening, you really let your kids off the hook for their poor behavior. Now they can focus on your out-of-control behavior instead of their own misbehavior.
If you can remain calm and actually lower your voice, you will be in a more powerful position. By remaining composed, you can hold your kids accountable for their behavior without escalating the situation.
Is it easy? No! But I learned to change my screaming into calm, confident parenting and you can too! Discover the effective parenting ideas in Priceless Parenting’s online parenting classes.
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
Too Much Screen Time Hurts Babies
TV and digital devices are certainly effective at keeping kids entertained. But how much is too much? Previously I've written about limiting screen time for older kids. Sadly pediatricians, psychologists and teachers are seeing babies and preschoolers with social, emotional and physical problems related to too much time on screens.
Parents are getting the message that digital devices are great for babies and toddlers. You can now buy a baby bouncy chair and a potty chair with iPad mounts. You can buy apps that are designed just for babies and toddlers.
One such app had this to say in its press release "Red Wagon Software announces the release of "Bonk! Bonk!" - its debut iPad and iPhone app for toddlers. Founded by Bill Brisky - a former Microsoft programmer - Inspiration for the endeavor started when Brisky's infant son Paul became enamored with his father's iPad and would delight in tapping images on the screen. Seeing his son's obvious joy, Brisky created "Bonk! Bonk!" - an interactive app where every time Paul would tap the screen a sound and colorful image would suddenly appear mesmerizing him for hours."
Kids who are mesmerized for hours by an app are missing out on developing critical interpersonal skills. Setting screen time limits is essential for keeping your kids healthy.
After presenting at the Crib to Classroom conference last weekend, teachers asked if I had a one page handout they could give parents on the problems caused by babies spending too much time with TV and digital devices. I didn't have a handout so I created one and it's featured in this month's newsletter. You are welcome to print and share copies of "Too Much Screen Time Hurts Babies".
Parents are getting the message that digital devices are great for babies and toddlers. You can now buy a baby bouncy chair and a potty chair with iPad mounts. You can buy apps that are designed just for babies and toddlers.
One such app had this to say in its press release "Red Wagon Software announces the release of "Bonk! Bonk!" - its debut iPad and iPhone app for toddlers. Founded by Bill Brisky - a former Microsoft programmer - Inspiration for the endeavor started when Brisky's infant son Paul became enamored with his father's iPad and would delight in tapping images on the screen. Seeing his son's obvious joy, Brisky created "Bonk! Bonk!" - an interactive app where every time Paul would tap the screen a sound and colorful image would suddenly appear mesmerizing him for hours."
Kids who are mesmerized for hours by an app are missing out on developing critical interpersonal skills. Setting screen time limits is essential for keeping your kids healthy.
After presenting at the Crib to Classroom conference last weekend, teachers asked if I had a one page handout they could give parents on the problems caused by babies spending too much time with TV and digital devices. I didn't have a handout so I created one and it's featured in this month's newsletter. You are welcome to print and share copies of "Too Much Screen Time Hurts Babies".
Monday, January 27, 2014
Guiding Your Kids Through Their Worries and Anxieties
Kids have little worries and big worries. Sometimes these worries, like monsters under the bed, seem ridiculous to adults but are very real for children.
When kids get too caught up in their anxiety, they miss out on activities and can be miserable. If your child has a lot of worries, check out Dr. Larry Cohen's book, The Opposite of Worry: The Playful Parenting Approach to Childhood Anxieties and Fears. It's filled with stories and practical advice for guiding your children through their worry jungle and out to the field of safety where they can have fun.
In her Amazon review of the book, one Mom explained how she tried out the Stop/Go method. "Basically a game, you and your child are engaged in a 'stopping and going' activity---with your child being the one 'in charge'. I tried it out the next morning when brushing my seven year old daughter's hair...and I am still in shock with the results! As long as she has had hair, brushing has been an absolute nightmare, each and every morning. I always knew it was rooted in anxiety, but wondered if there were some other issues too because her reactions/screams/crying were so intense. Anyway, tried Stop/Go the other morning (which literally took 15 seconds) and she was laughing and begging me to keep brushing!!!!"
When kids get too caught up in their anxiety, they miss out on activities and can be miserable. If your child has a lot of worries, check out Dr. Larry Cohen's book, The Opposite of Worry: The Playful Parenting Approach to Childhood Anxieties and Fears. It's filled with stories and practical advice for guiding your children through their worry jungle and out to the field of safety where they can have fun.
In her Amazon review of the book, one Mom explained how she tried out the Stop/Go method. "Basically a game, you and your child are engaged in a 'stopping and going' activity---with your child being the one 'in charge'. I tried it out the next morning when brushing my seven year old daughter's hair...and I am still in shock with the results! As long as she has had hair, brushing has been an absolute nightmare, each and every morning. I always knew it was rooted in anxiety, but wondered if there were some other issues too because her reactions/screams/crying were so intense. Anyway, tried Stop/Go the other morning (which literally took 15 seconds) and she was laughing and begging me to keep brushing!!!!"
Thursday, January 23, 2014
6-Week Online Parenting Class - Start Today!
Parenting is a dance you do with your kids. If you don't like their moves, take this class and learn how to change your lead! | ||||
Discover your children's strengths and increase their competence Aim for high expectations based on your children's developmental level Notice misbehavior and respond with reasonable, valuable consequences Control your reaction to stressful parenting situations Enjoy your children and take time to renew yourself |  | |||
Priceless Parenting classes are grounded on decades of positive parenting experiences from real life situations and backed by the latest scientific research in child development. The DANCE Parenting Class combines the powerful online parenting classes and written questions/answers with the class author, Kathy Slattengren, M.Ed. | ||||
Space is limited. Register today for one of these classes.
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Tuesday, January 21, 2014
One Child's Experience of Autism
What is really going on in the mind of an autistic child? Often the autistic child's behavior is puzzling even to the child's parents and can be extremely difficult to handle. The seriously limited ability for an autistic child to communicate makes understanding the child even more challenging.
Naoki Higashida, a 13-year-old Japanese boy with autism, learned to express himself through writing with the help of a computer. His book, The Reason I Jump: The Inner Voice of a Thirteen-Year-Old Boy with Autism, provides an amazing window into his world. He answers a variety of questions including "Why do you ask the same questions over and over?" and "What's the reason you jump?"
His answers reveal a great depth of understanding and self-awareness. His brilliance is locked in a body that doesn't respond to his commands the way most people's bodies respond.
Although he’s autistic, some of his answers beautifully apply to all children. When he was asked “Why do you do things you should even when you’ve been told a million times not to?” He responded
Naoki Higashida, a 13-year-old Japanese boy with autism, learned to express himself through writing with the help of a computer. His book, The Reason I Jump: The Inner Voice of a Thirteen-Year-Old Boy with Autism, provides an amazing window into his world. He answers a variety of questions including "Why do you ask the same questions over and over?" and "What's the reason you jump?"
His answers reveal a great depth of understanding and self-awareness. His brilliance is locked in a body that doesn't respond to his commands the way most people's bodies respond.
Although he’s autistic, some of his answers beautifully apply to all children. When he was asked “Why do you do things you should even when you’ve been told a million times not to?” He responded
“It may look as if we’re being bad out of naughtiness, but honestly, we’re not. When we’re being told off, we feel terrible that yet again we’ve done what we’ve been told not to. But when the chance comes once more, we’ve pretty much forgotten about the last time and we just get carried away yet again. It’s as if something that isn’t us is urging us on.
You must be thinking: “Is he never going to learn?” We know we’re making you sad and upset, but it’s as if we don’t have any say in it, I’m afraid, and that’s the way it is. But please, whatever you do, don’t give up on us. We need your help.”
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
Successfully Tackling Touchy Topics
How do you feel when you need to talk to your child, your child’s teacher, your spouse or someone else about a touchy topic? Are you excited to address this important issue or do you feel like running in the opposite direction? Most people feel a significant amount of anxiety when they think about addressing a situation which is emotionally charged and opinions differ.
When approaching a difficult conversation you have three basic options:
1. Choose to ignore it and hope the situation magically gets better.
2. Launch head first into the conversation and handle it poorly.
3. Prepare ahead of time and handle the conversation well.
While it would be great if challenging situations got better on their own, since this rarely happens let’s look at how you can prepare to handle the conversation well.
Preparing for the Conversation
You will increase the odds of having a productive conversation if you prepare ahead of time. Begin by considering your motive for having this conversation.
In the book Crucial Conversations Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High, the authors identify three important questions to ask yourself when preparing for a crucial conversation:
(finish reading the article on Priceless Parenting)
When approaching a difficult conversation you have three basic options:
1. Choose to ignore it and hope the situation magically gets better.
2. Launch head first into the conversation and handle it poorly.
3. Prepare ahead of time and handle the conversation well.
While it would be great if challenging situations got better on their own, since this rarely happens let’s look at how you can prepare to handle the conversation well.
Preparing for the Conversation
You will increase the odds of having a productive conversation if you prepare ahead of time. Begin by considering your motive for having this conversation.
In the book Crucial Conversations Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High, the authors identify three important questions to ask yourself when preparing for a crucial conversation:
(finish reading the article on Priceless Parenting)
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